For a while now we have been contemplating putting the boys in the same room. Now that Peter is sleeping through the night (finally--it only took a year!) I think I'm ready. But every time I think "this is the week", I chicken out. Here is why:
1) Peter goes down around 7:30. He may or may not fuss a while before he actually falls asleep, but he is a pretty light sleeper and if there is any big noise in the few hours after he goes down then he usually wakes up (then puts himself back to sleep). If he's tired enough, we won't hear another peep from him until the morning (6:30ish).
2) Clark goes down at about 8:00. However "goes down" doesn't mean what you think it does. What it means to us is that we turn off the lights and tuck him into bed, but then he spends the next few hours playing the "up-and-down" game. He will come downstairs a ton of times to tell us he has to go potty, and since it's still fairly new we can't tell him to go back to bed. So he totally manipulates us and much to our dismay and frustration, he literally does not fall asleep until around 10:30.
3) Occasionally in the middle of the night, Clark will wake up to go to the bathroom. Because he is usually still half asleep, he'll cry out because he's in pain and doesn't realize the sensation until I make him sit on the toilet. That will FOR SURE wake Peter up, and I don't know how easy it would be to put them both back to sleep after that.
So what do we do? Do we just bite the bullet and stick them together and face the fact that they won't ever fall asleep?? Or do I wait longer? But what am I waiting for? The day that Clark falls asleep at 8:30 again? (This hasn't happened in WEEKS!). Or the day my next baby will need Peter's room? The only reason I want them together--is because I want them together. Is that reason enough or no? Feedback, please!
I crammed 3 kids in one room to give my youngest his own space for napping. My advice? As long as there is space to keep them apart, don't put them together until their sleep patterns are more alike. Otherwise, nap time and bedtime everyday will be a battle. Just my thought.
ReplyDeleteHi. I'm a blurker. But I thought I'd give you input here, seeing as I used to share a room with my brother who was two years older than me. I say go for it. When my brother and I were little and shared a room, we bonded SO much, and it's stuck with us to this day. So there's my input.
ReplyDeleteIf it is really important for you to have them together, maybe you should just dive in and let them adjust to each other. It might mean a few weeks of difficulty, but eventually they'll figure it out. At least I assume they will. But then again, I may not have any idea what I'm talking about and I'm just getting myself psyched for my boys to share a room as soon as Roscoe starts sleeping through the night. Because really? Where else are we going to put him?
ReplyDeleteYou fancy people and your 3 bedroom house.
I say give it a try. We just put our girls together even tho Ashtyn is a bit of a light sleeper.
ReplyDeleteBUT naptime I still seperate them. In fact I still put Haylie in a pack n play/crib because she can't resist the urge to play instead of sleep. So maybe just try night at first and use a pack n play to seperate for naps. GOOD LUCCK!
I'm of the "if you have space, use it" opinion. But then, I have horrible awful memories of sharing a room with my sisters... we were all too different
ReplyDeleteIt wouldn't be worth it to me! We're waiting until #3 kicks Lily out of the nursery! Both of my girls are sleeping well at night, but I don't really want to disrupt the apple cart...it isn't worth it to me at least! It sounds like it might make Peter have sleep issues he isn't dealing with right now! Good luck!
ReplyDeleteJust do it. Don't wait for the "perfect time" because there is no such thing.
ReplyDeleteIt seems like a lot of work to get him to do this and him to do that just to upset it all over again when you put them together. You might try simplifying things and putting them to bed at the same time. Start a new bedtime routine that includes both of them in their room together.
There will probably never be a time when everyone goes to sleep at 8:00 and sleeps through the night. Aaron often is still awake talking to himself at 11:00! I don't care at all as long as he's in bed. Kids get used to each other and will soon start sleeping through all of the 1:00am crying potty trips (yep, we're in the middle of that too).
Just put them together and let the kinks work out (it sounds easier than it often is) and then you hopefully won't have to have another change in sleep habits for a long long time.
I say put them together. Try it for a week and if it really doesn't look good, you can always go back. Liz was having problems with Brookelynn waking up in the middle of the night for a while when her kids were separated. She put Carter in there to try it, and it come to find out, Brookelynn did much better when she wasn't alone. Plus, when Brooke wakes up, she knows that Carter is sleeping and will just sit in her bed reading books or singing quietly until she falls back asleep. She even started trying to comfort Carter one night he woke up crying by reading (or babbling). I say try it. What do you have to loose?
ReplyDeleteI'm sure you don't care to hear my advice, but.... I would put them together sooner rather than later. I had the same problem with my two, even though they are still so little- I didn't want to risk either of them (or me) losing sleep. I want them in the same room, and I figured there is no time like the present. I wait til Jenna is asleep, and then lay Adam down an hour or so later. He wakes up occasionally at night, and she doesn't seem to notice.
ReplyDeleteGood luck!
Our sleeping still isn't ideal - but we have all three in the same room. Jane wakes at least once in the night - sometimes twice. Marta yells out in the night. They all go to sleep at different times. But the one thing I can say is that they are getting quite used to sleeping through the others' noise. Me? I still wake up and have to deal with it.
ReplyDeleteFrom my own experience, I would say keep them apart for now. Bedtimes at our house were a disaster for a few years because Isaac and Adam shared a room. It was so hard to get them to settle down at night. Peter is young enough that you probably won't have that problem yet, but it will happen soon enough. I spent many nights holding their bedroom door shut so they couldn't get out or sitting between them holding them down so they would stay in their beds. They eventually get past that stage and bedtimes get much easier, but I suggest, if you don't have to, don't do it just yet.
ReplyDeleteOh my, lots of input. Well here are my two cents. If you've got the room, why rush it? Seriously, wait at least until Clark has the potty thing down and the manipulation thing worked out. And Peter will handle it better when he's older. We had to combine them at 1 and 2. It was AWEFUL. We put E in the bathroom it was so bad. We had to do it again 6 mo. later and it was a gazillion times better. They play, E is often sleep deprived, there's not a huge battle every day like Robyn said. There is no perfect time, but i've found older is better. You'll have to separate for nap-time 'till they both give 'em up though.
ReplyDeleteI'd wait. There will be PLENTY of years of them sharing a room when that really has emotional significance to THEM.
ReplyDeleteI'm just glad that I am out of that phase of life. We tried our kids together but Jarom is not a sleeper so it didn't work out to well. You will never know how it will go until you try. Good luck!!
ReplyDeleteI say go for it. My situation is a little different because we all sleep in the same bed though...It took Ethan three weeks to not wake up when Samantha woke up crying to nurse. It may take a while for your boys to get used to be in the same room, but I would want to have kinks worked out before the next baby came along just so that wouldn't be another thing to work out when the new baby would be here. Whenever you decide, good luck. :O)
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